These are some bad-ass frito banditos right here...
http://gma.yahoo.com/fla-siblings-ch...opstories.html
These are some bad-ass frito banditos right here...
http://gma.yahoo.com/fla-siblings-ch...opstories.html
Oh yeah, that's Florida for ya .....
Ya know, even crooks need to have some self-respect. A van full of snacks? C'mon! Rob a bank or a liquor store fer chrissakes!
"Oh, naw baybee. I'm gonna get us enuff corn chips to fill up this trailer!"
Florida Man strikes again!
For further adventures and exploits of Florida Man, the world's most inept supervillain, see:
- http://adventuresoffloridaman.tumblr.com/
- https://twitter.com/_FloridaMan
- http://gawker.com/5983374/florida-ma...-about-florida
I wouldn't eat pork rinds if you paid me. Those things are disgusting.
They're awesome! Especially when you put some Tabasco on 'em.Originally Posted by JKL2000
They've got, like, they're own little world down there, don't they?
Music isn't about chops, or even about talent - it's about sound and the way that sound communicates to people. Mike Keneally
Florida Man... LOL! Now I'm going to be perusing the internet for Florida Man headlines.
I believe his main competition is Ohio Man, at least in the matter of idiotic, grotesque, or horrifying crimes. Why this should be, I do not know. Florida has a certain inherent strangeness - a history of fortune-hunting, a huge wealth differential between the very rich and the very poor, a big organized-crime presence almost from the beginning, one of the US capitals of land scams and other financial trickery (Bernie Madoff owned a mansion there), a place to either retire wealthy or make it big any way you can - and it's not really surprising that Florida Man comes from there. It's like California with no industry - just endless sun, a little agriculture, the relaxing rich, the scrabbling poor, and limitless opportunities to work, scam, or shoot your way to the top. It's America exaggerated.Florida Man... LOL! Now I'm going to be perusing the internet for Florida Man headlines.
But Ohio? It's not weird. Not at all. Yes, it's in the Rust Belt, and I suppose a lot of people who used to have good jobs are now poor and going crazy with it. But why do they reach the idiotic, grotesque, or horrifying heights of Ohio Man - whose latest horrifying (in this case) identity is Ariel Castro, the Cleveland sex-slave kidnapper? No clue.
Last edited by Baribrotzer; 05-16-2013 at 05:04 AM.
Oh yeah, you got that right ! Every nut-job from up north gets here sooner or later.
"Florida - arrive on vacation, leave on probation !" One of the more popular (and true) sayings 'round these parts !
Remember the "News of the Weird" stories carried in some newspapers ?? --- based in Tampa Florida - of course.
I guess they all sorta drain down to the bottom of the map, and dribble into that big saggy condom hanging off the front of the US. Except the ones from Ohio. I can't see why - it's got that nice point on the bottom for them to drip down out of, but they seem to stay right there in Ohio. Maybe the drain is blocked. I dunno.
But oddly enough, even though Texas is also at the bottom of the map, it doesn't seem to happen there. Or at least not the same way - you certainly hear about yo-yos from Texas, but most of them are homegrown, rather than nutcases attracted by it having a reputation as a place where even the biggest wackadoodles and shameless outright crooks can prosper. I suppose that's it: the myth of Texas has more to do with being a Texan and living the Texas life, than with it being a place open to anybody where easy money is just there for the taking. You can go there and do OK if you're an outsider, but you really have to become a Texan or already be one to do great.
Texas is another world by it's self. Who the plook wants to go to Texass on vacation ?? Or retire ? (people from Ohio?) I lived there for a year, the stories I could tell !! The natives there are known as 'Texicans'. If you (actually when you) run into an arrogant Texass native say "Oh, you're a Texican ?" and you can see the gears turning in their heads trying to figure if they're being insulted or not !!
And don't get me started on Ohio. From the Ohioians I've seen and met, the 'truth' is rather insulting. Maybe it's something in the water. (If they're lucky.)
What amazes me is the talk every now and then of Texas actually seceding from the Union. Why would we stop them? The country's average IQ would go up about 10 points!
Music isn't about chops, or even about talent - it's about sound and the way that sound communicates to people. Mike Keneally
I swear you stole that line from me.What amazes me is the talk every now and then of Texas actually seceding from the Union. Why would we stop them? The country's average IQ would go up about 10 points!
Seriously, though. Here's one big vote for Texas secession.
Wouldn't surprise me.I swear you stole that line from me.
Music isn't about chops, or even about talent - it's about sound and the way that sound communicates to people. Mike Keneally
These people are emblematic of why America is so screwed up. The police should have let them keep the snacks. Their arteries would have hardened and done them in in no time.
On a totally different topic, yet one that certainly fits under this thread title...
http://www.breitbart.com/Big-Hollywo...or--19-million
Click at your own risk
Some funny comments on that page.
Reminds me of the old joke that if the Texas Rangers faced the Montreal Expos in the World Series, it would be the first to be played entirely outside of the United States.What amazes me is the talk every now and then of Texas actually seceding from the Union. Why would we stop them? The country's average IQ would go up about 10 points!
Texas planned a wall to keep Yankees out. Yankees were supporting it too !!
http://news.google.com/newspapers?ni...&pg=6860,63165
Quote - Bob Parsons - Tx = "Edenesque land" ??????? -- Obviously he never saw the west half of TX.
Or the east half.
Kidding aside, I guess there's some beautiful parts - the Big Bend area, for example. But most of it is a lot of hot, and a lot of flat.
Did I ever tell you guys about my brief trip across Texas and what I saw there? This was six or eight years ago, and I drove across on I-40 to, no lie, minimize my time in Texas. Just three hours or so. About halfway through, I started seeing billboards for an attraction in Groom, Texas:"The Largest Free-Standing Cross in the Western Hemisphere. An Amazing Spiritual Experience". After a while, on the horizon I saw something that looked like this: + . So I figured, "Ah, it's in the next town." But it wasn't in the next town. It was in the town after that, on the other side of it. And it was big.
250px-Groom-Texas.jpg
It appeared to be made of corrugated barn-roofing, and was not shaped like a real cross: Instead, the arms and shaft were twisted 45 degrees, and looked like <> in section, rather than [] - I don't know why, but suspect the reason might have had something to do with wind-loading. Around the base, there was a set of Stations of the Cross, and a gift shop. The whole deal seemed like the perfect illustration of America - that great conflation of God and Mammon that we do so well. And it crossed my mind that if Sleepytime Gorilla Museum had ever driven through on that route, they would have had to stop. Those guys have an immense fascination with redneck Americana, and can't get enough of it. So some months later, I ran into Nils, and asked him. And sure enough, they had.
Apparently Bill Nye the Science Guy recently got booed at a Waco presentation for outlandishly claiming that the Moon reflects the sunlight, instead of providing it's own light like the "Good Book" claims.
Well, from the account I read, he was baiting them in the way he phrased it:
It's also possible that some local group of Born-Agains were "doing a Westboro", so to speak: Showing up at a lecture by a man who, after all, bills himself as "The Science Guy", specifically expecting to have their beliefs contradicted. So they could "witness" their faith and storm out in high dudgeon. And if Bill had known they were there, I could see someone like him providing them with a particularly big, juicy, and absurd piece of red meat - not something iffy like evolution or carbon dating or the speed of light, but a bit of grade-school physics and astronomy that's pretty much 100% proven, and accepted by every legit church.But nothing got people as riled as when he brought up Genesis 1:16, which reads: "God made two great lights -- the greater light to govern the day and the lesser light to govern the night. He also made the stars."
The lesser light, he pointed out, is not a light at all, but only a reflector.
At this point, several people in the audience stormed out in fury. One woman yelled "We believe in God!" and left with three children, thus ensuring that people across America would read about the incident and conclude that Waco is as nutty as they'd always suspected.
EDIT: Hare's a link to the original article: http://www.thinkatheist.com/profiles...d-in-texas-for And it really isn't all that recent - it dates from 2006.
Read some of the comments!
Last edited by Baribrotzer; 05-18-2013 at 03:08 PM.
You could say he baited them. Or you could say he was instructing about how an open mind is the best tool for discovery and understanding.
Maybe. But he must have known that in Texas, he might be dealing with people to whom TRUTH (as revealed in the Bible) is everything that matters, and to whom "discovery", "understanding", or "an open mind" matter not at all. And to whom being "instructed" would amount to sitting there and swallowing the insults of some Godless city slicker like "Bill Nye, the Science Guy".
Furthermore, attempts to reconcile the two won't hold much water: To people who believe that the entire Bible is no less than a literal dictation of the Word of God, arguments that the Ancient Hebrew word for "light" can mean both reflected and generated light, or that anyone in Old Testament times who knew that the Earth was round might also have realized that the Moon simply reflects the Sun's light don't matter either. The King James Bible says "light", they understand that to mean generated light, and that settles it.
Last edited by Baribrotzer; 05-18-2013 at 07:30 PM.
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