Going To Concerts By Yourself

[SteveSly]

One thing that seems to be happening to me more and more as I get older is going to concerts by myself. I still have some friends who are into going to shows, but not nearly as many as when I was younger. Plus, it seems like the people who do just generally have more conflicts than they used to. My wife will go with me sometimes, but she is not really that into music and most of the time would rather skip it when it comes to most of the music I like. When I was younger I don’t remember ever going to a show alone, but these days, in order to see some of the artists that I want to see I do it fairly often. General admission shows are cool since you just kind of blend in with the crowd, but I always feel a little weird if it is a reserved seating situation sitting by myself. Anyway…..the reason I was thinking about this is that I went to a blues show (Tommy Castro) last Friday night by myself. I had a good time, but it probably would have been more fun going with someone. Anyone else have this happening as you get older?

Steve Sly

[rcarlberg]

When I get out to shows -- which isn't often anymore -- I almost always go by myself because everyone I know is busy -- otherwise engaged -- too tired -- not motivated.

It comes with not being 20 and footloose and fancy free anymore.

[Rufus]

Went to see Simple Minds by myself last Friday & managed to get a front centre balcony seat. If I had wanted more than one ticket they would have only been able to accomodate a seat on the third tier on the last row so going by yourself can have it's advantages!

I have a group of mates who I always go to prog/rock concerts with but they weren't Simple Minds fans !!!

[Man In The Mountain]

I started going to shows alone near the end of the 90's. Sometimes I have a lot of fun, especially at a club show if I run into people I know. If not, it can definitely be kind of a weird or lonely experience. Or you end up sitting with strangers who are real jerks. For a while over the last 10 years I managed to find some people to go with, either people I met on-line from forums like these, or friends I could rope into it. But, sometimes that can be more trouble than it's worth, in making the arrangements, and dealing with their own issues or time constraints. Lately for me, it seems easier just to go by myself... but I have to admit, I tire of it, and now look more to my wife to go along with me. Even though I have to cater to her quite a bit, I don't mind.

[spellbound]

Yeah, Steve, that has been happening to me, too. Sometimes there can be an advantage to attending a concert alone. I went to a local auditorium to see Al Stewart a few years ago. I went to the box office in advance to purchase a ticket (something you can no longer do there, as they have jumped on the "pay online and pay extra" bandwagon). They showed me where the empty single seats were, as well as all the other unsold seats. There was one single seat in the front row near center stage. I chose that one. I have gone to see Claudia Quintet a couple times. Both times I went alone, but I knew a friend of mine was going to be there.

In my younger years I almost always went to concerts with friends. If I still lived where I lived then, I don't know if those friends would still be into going to concerts. As much fun as it is sharing the concert experience with others, and it is more fun, I don't really mind going alone to see bands that I like and few friends have heard of. I always invite my wife, but she usually doesn't go. Now the artists I see are less popular and playing smaller venues. Then, it was often big bands at big venues. Compare seeing Pink Floyd in 1975 with a crowd of maybe 20,000 to seeing Dan Hicks & his Hot Licks in the late '90s with maybe 50 people.

[NogbadTheBad]

Same here, i probably go to 90% of concerts alone and have been to most festivals on my own, except when I took my daughter to NF Apocalypse. I'm pretty comfortable on my own and have no problems chatting to random strangers so I've always enjoyed it.

[GuitarGeek]

I've always gone to concerts by myself. I never had anyone to go to shows with. I only started going to shows with other people when I started go to festivals, because I needed a ride and a roommate. Beyond that, if I've gone to shows locally with friends, it was because someone called me up and said "Let's go see (fill in the blank)", it's only been in the last few years, because it's only been that I've had friends who were thoughtful enough to do that.

[No Pride]

I don't go to shows nearly as often as I used to, but when I do, I go by myself more often than not. I can't afford most of the bigger name acts I'm interested in seeing (like Steely Dan), but fortunately my musical tastes run towards more "off the radar" bands/artist; most of them jazz, fusion or prog. I think the last show I went to was Mike Keneally/Rick Musallam playing duo and as I suspected would happen, I ran into some of PE's "Midwest Gang" folks there. That's the thing, I hardly ever end up alone because I always run into fellow musician buddies at these shows. Sometimes my girlfriend will tag along, but not often, because she usually has to wake up for work at around 6 AM. Besides, she only likes a smallish portion of the music I like. A couple of years ago, she took me to two shows for my birthday weekend (Tommy Emmanuel one night and Hiromi's Sonicbloom the next one). She enjoyed both quite a bit, although I don't know how much she'd dig Hiromi's music if Hiromi wasn't so cute and fun to watch. She came to an Allan Holdsworth show with me after hearing me mention his name so often and she hated it. "That was the most self-indulgent music I've ever heard in my life," she said. That's okay with me, I'll be able to focus more the next time, when she stays home.

I'm fine with going to hear an artist/band if I don't run into any friends though. Socializing between sets is an added bonus, but the reason I'm going is to hear some music... I don't really need any company for that.

[Mikhael]

+1 on going it alone. 90% of the time it has to do with music that I have no friends into. I have a buddy that goes to see Dream Theater with me (and last time we took our kids, and my daughter really liked it).

My daughter wanted to see Yes, and then I told her that Jon and Rick aren't in the band anymore. Her answer? "Ew. Never mind."

[Vic2012]

Never had any hangups about going to concerts, movies, bars, churches, etc. alone. The only time I might feel awkward or uncomfortable at a concert is if it's an assigned seating show.

[strawberrybrick]

I do almost everything by myself...

[gpeccary]

I used to go with friends back in the day. But now? I go alone 95% of the time. The biggest reason is that I know very few people interested in the music I go to see. The last thing I want is to be bothered by someone uninterested in the show I'm seeing and moaning about it. I save myself the trouble and annoyances. The one person I've gone to shows the most with in the last 15 years is my daughter. I often see girlfriends with their guys and think that HAS to be great, but alas, it hasn't happened to me!

[Spiral]

As much fun as it is sharing the concert experience with others, and it is more fun, I don't really mind going alone to see bands that I like and few friends have heard of.

I'm fine with going to hear an artist/band if I don't run into any friends though. Socializing between sets is an added bonus, but the reason I'm going is to hear some music... I don't really need any company for that.

This is me. My concertgoing life has always been a mix of (roughly) half alone and half with others. It used to be that friends sometimes weren't interested in such weird stuff, now it's more that they've got kids and don't have much of a social life (and are probably still not interested anyway). Other times they or my wife are willing to make the effort to come along if we've got common ground. Whichever, I'm generally just happy to enjoy either situation for what it is.

[WHORG]

Rarely if ever alone - my musical tastes (and crowd) run wide, so there's always someone.

My son is almost 15 - and has been to numerous shows where all-ages were allowed . . . and he's always wanting to go w/me these days it seems. Many of you have seen him (and my daughter) at Progday for many years now.

It's always fun to share a live music experience if you ask me . . . . but I have had no problem going solo when the situation arose.

jk

[JKL2000]

Yeah, I often go alone, but I usually run into people I know. I hate the aspect of coordinating ticket buying for a group, so I prefer to just buy my ticket. If it's General Admission I can hook up with people before the show. If it's assigned seating (kind of rare) I can talk to people before the show then go find my seat.

There was a thing on NPR this weekend about the phone app "Grinder," which is for gay people to find each other based on certain parameters they enter, using the GPS on the phone. I've often thought an app like this for people with ANY specific interests, such as prog, would be pretty interesting to try out. It might be good before concerts. I'm going to the Steven Wilson show in NYC soon - at that show I'll surely run into people I know. But I'm also going to the Justin Hayward show in Tarrytown in August. It'd be interesting if I had such an app to enter "Marillion" or "Camel" and see if I found any fans of these bands there.

There MUST be an app like this already, because I know apps like Grinder but not necessarily for gay people have been around for a long time now.

Ok, now let the jokes fly...

[rcarlberg]

Ok, now let the jokes fly...

So would you object if the fans you found were all gay?

[rapidfirerob]

I've been going alone on and off for many years. If I can find someone, great, otherwise I will go alone. It's better than not going.

[ItalProgRules]

I tried it once and it was all weird and lonely.

I prefer going with friends.

[markwoll]

If I want to see the show I will go alone.
I have missed way too many shows due to lack of 'show buddies'.
I guess I need to meet new 'buddies'
The prog crowd is small enough around here that I tend to see the same faces over the years.
It is just a matter of getting up the nerve to get to know them.
With the exception of the big shows, most are general admission...and even when they are assigned ( even with friends ), once the music starts I might as well be alone.
Lucky for me my wife is pretty broad minded music wise. I go to see most shows she wants and she goes to some of the ones I like.

[bill g]

I never have, but we get so few concerts in the Seattle/Tacoma area. My wife is a huge Jon fan, so we've seen Yes and Jon Anderson solo, and a few scattered shows that come up like the High Llamas, The Flower Kings (twice), Cocteau Twins, Sundays. And I went with my daughter to the Musical Box. But I envision Seaprog to be just me this summer, so that would be my first.

[progholio]

i very rarely go to concerts by myself, that's the cool thing about having a wife that's into the same stuff as me, only bummer is those big shows like Rush and Sir Paul add up pretty quickly.

[yogibear]

i've been going to prog rock and jazz fusion concerts by myself since the early 80's. i don't think i've been to a concert since the early 90's.

[Gladiator1634]

I have a friend that I grew up with that's into a lot of the same music we go to many shows together and he actually has went a few times alone and claims he had a great time. I haven't been in that situation yet but It seems like each time it almost comes to that I call my brother. If that fails I'll ask one of my sons who are in their 20's and enjoy all the classic music from the 70's. I took them to see Genesis, Roger Waters & The Who, shows they probably couldn't afford to attend on their own. A little costly for me but it works. Even took them to see the Musical Box.

[arabicadabra]

I started when I realised that there were shows that were absolute must-sees for me and that I was the only one who felt that way out of my friends and family. Jeff Beck in 2006 on a rainy Monday night at the Starlight Ballroom in NJ changed my life - if I hadn't witnessed that, the first few gigs with Vinnie Colaiuta (and no Tal yet), I'd never have felt such power - and would never have heard the USA Bootleg 06 he was selling from a few nights earlier - a record that profoundly changed my approach and probably the approach of the guitarist in my band. So yeah - I'll go alone; I like myself.

[beano]

I have had to go to a lot of shows/movies/ events, etc. solo (wife not really interested, kids don't really follow music , etc) and when people hear this , most of them think it is pretty odd...and that kinda bums me out but whatca gonna do...I am a supporting member of a local NYC college radio station and usually get 2 tickets/ guest list shots every 30 days...Sometimes I can't give one away...I have even tried here on PE to no avail...