The Damn I'm Old Thread - Putting Up With Being a Geezer

[Vic2012]

Sincere condolences.

[NogbadTheBad]

Very sorry to hear that.

[Duncan Glenday]

This evening my dad has died. Life sucks.

So sorry to hear that, Renate.

Best wishes - and I hope you find comfort soon.

[ronmac]

I'm so sorry for your loss, Renate. I hope he went peacefully. It will take time to heal, but you will heal.

[mozo-pg]

Sorry Renate. Very sad to hear your news.

[Lou]

Horrible news. My deepest condolences.

[Garyhead]

Sorry Renate. Don't be afraid to post here....many are here to help.

[markwoll]

Sorry for your loss Renate. Seek Peace.

[SteveSly]

This evening my dad has died. Life sucks.

Very sorry for your loss.

[Shadow]

Sorry to hear this. My mother passed in January. She had a good life probably like your father. Be happy for your time with him like I was with my mother.

[spellbound]

So very sorry for your loss, Renate. I lost both my parents during the Bush Depression. I know it isn't easy, but you'll make it through this rough time.

[BobM]

Our thoughts and prayers are with you

[proggy_jazzer]

We don't know each other, Renate, but i would like to add my condolences. This group can be a good source of friendship and hopefully comfort. I hope you can make use of it. Peace.

[Dave (in MA)]

So sorry, Renate.

[grego]

Condolences, Renate...

[TheLoony]

Sorry man, going through the same shit with Mom. It sucks and sorry to hear this.

[Plasmatopia]

My condolences, Renate. My thoughts are with you.

[Rarebird]

Thanks for all the condolences.

Yesterday was a busy day, organising things for the funeral. Selecting a death announcement. Found something with musical notes, which I thought was apopriate, because my dad played the banjo. Looked for a nice picture. The picture I originally had in mind was not suited. My dad is standing with a very large statue of Karl Marx in Trier, so my dad looks rather small. Besides there is an unknown lady in the background. But I found a nice picture I took 4 years ago on our first rivercruise. Today there is not much I can do. Tomorrow I'm going to write the death announcements, together with a neighbour who had offered her help. She has also helped when my mother died.
In some way I seem to be doing a bit better than when my mother died, but I'm rather good at not thinking to much about the death of my dad. I suppose this year I've gotten a bit on terms with the idea of loosing my dad. We used to do everything together, but after his hospitalisation at the end of January, things were different, because of Covid-19 and because my dad's health was affected by his last braininfarct. So I had to care more for him, which wasn't always easy, because he was very stubborn and wouldn't always listen to sensible advices, like using a walker also for indoors. Even outside he sometimes forgot his walker.

[ronmac]

We're all thinking of you and sending healing thoughts, Renate.

Take it one day at a time is all you can do.

[Rarebird]

Last Wednessday we had the funeral of my dad.
He wanted 2 pieces of music, from François Couperin, played by John Williams. I could have selected more music, but couldn't think of anything. Only during the funeral-gathering I thought of something my dad probably would have liked, an arrangement of Italian Concerto by Bach, I made for synthesizers, because my dad didn't like harpsichord. https://rarebirdproductions.bandcamp...alian-concerto

Now I have to take care of a lot of stuff, like ending things and moving stuff from my dad. I wanted to pack his tenor-banjo in the case, but in some way it didn't fit.
A friend of my dad will take care of his collection of books, records and CDs on jazz. Don't mention jazz-rock, because according to my dad that was kind of blasphemy. His love for jazz stopped somewhere between 1930-1935. He stopped reading a jazz-magazine, when it started to add swing and bop.

[JKL2000]

Sorry for your loss, Renate. Please check in with us when you can. We need you in our community.

[TheLoony]

Now I have to take care of a lot of stuff, like ending things and moving stuff from my dad.

I can easily identify with your situation as I've already started that process. Thinking ahead of time. Thousands of worthless books as Mom and I both are smokers. The books stink and no one will take them.

So in the recycling they go. Got a closet full of 'em and a small bookcase gone. Lots of political junk yet found Mom's yearbooks from 1949 and '52, a text book from that time with loads of Mom's handwriting.

I haven't gotten to the drawers in that room yet. There's pics that date back more than a hundred years full of people I have no clue about yet there's history there so what do I do with it? Toss it? Give it to who, the frakking Mormons? They do like their genealogy.

There's probably a lot of junk you'll find but there might be, like me, some gems. Little clues as to who that person was, that we never got to know. Apparently, Mom's was really popular. Way more sig's in her yearbooks than mine. Honestly, she had more in one than I had in all of mine. But, I'm Loony, so, shit happens. Mom's has two '49 yearbooks and I wonder if she had to get two just to get all her well wishes from her classmates or if it's an A-M type of thing. Haven't looked but what I saw was pretty impressive.

Thinking of many things but I'll leave this rant with the song I'm thinking of - Triumph - Time Goes By. Not gonna link the video as no one needs to watch it and I'm lazy.


ETA: Forgot why I came to this thread. Watching a doc on NatGeo about scamming and the Jamaicans, who they are chronicling, are totally going after the elderly. Mom's doesn't have control of her bank card so she can't get scammed as far as I know. Quite scary as they don't care. It's stealing back from them what was taken in their eyes.

[Rarebird]

My dad and I don't smoke, so no stinking books. A lot of books on traditional jazz and also CDs and records. A friend of my dad will help me with that.

Yes, old pictures, there are a lot of those. I'm not going to get rid of those.

On Saturday I've transfered my dad's old tenor banjo to my home. It looks nice, but I can't play. On Sunday I transfered a box with stuff from my old modeltrains. I suppose I'm going to put some of those on display.

Luckily some neighbours have offered help, but they are all rather old and have health-problems, so I'm not sure what they can do, exept perhaps help me with some administrative tasks.

[SteveSly]

Cleaning out dad's stuff is not fun at all. When my dad died a bit over a year ago, he just lived in a two bedroom apartment, but had it crammed full of as much stuff as possible to have in the space provided. Between me, my wife and my sister, it took quite a while to get everything cleared out. We threw a lot away. Gave some stuff to charity. Gave some stuff to friends and the rest went into my sister's garage for her annual big summer garage sale. Going through his things we learned some things we never know about him. The whole thing felt like an intrusion into someone's private life. Then there is all the legal stuff too. Depending on how your dad had things set up, that could take a while. My dad had a will and most of his stuff set up, but had one bank account that for some reason was not include and ended up having to go through probate, which was a pain. It was the account with the smallest amount in it and was a waste of time, but a good money maker for the lawyers.

Oh well, I hope for the best for you. No matter what it sucks to go through it.

[Jerjo]

I had to clean up after both my mom and my mother-in-law, both had twisted notions as what to keep. It took forever. I'm starting off the year with a round of Swedish Death Cleaning - a practice of sorting through ALL of your shit so it's not a burden on those you leave behind. My wife and I have no children, so the likely clean-up would have to be my niece and nephew. I'd rather not burden them more than I have to.

https://www.familyhandyman.com/list/...eath-cleaning/