Thread: The new Joke Thread

  1. #1426
    Highly Evolved Orangutan JKL2000's Avatar
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    Ok, this isn't a joke, but my 19 year old son just texted me the funniest question. He's not quite a millenial, but close enough:

    "Who exactly were Sonny and Cher? I know they were singers, but why were they important? Are they any good?"

    I pretty much set him straight. He asked because he was watching "Moonstruck," which I've actually never seen.
    "Of course you are allowed to trumpet your profound ignorance by disagreeing with me." -- Facelift

  2. #1427
    Member since 7/13/2000 Hal...'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JKL2000 View Post
    Ok, this isn't a joke, but my 19 year old son just texted me the funniest question. He's not quite a millenial, but close enough:

    "Who exactly were Sonny and Cher? I know they were singers, but why were they important? Are they any good?"
    Okay, so what where your answers?
    This conversation can serve no purpose anymore. Goodbye.

  3. #1428
    Highly Evolved Orangutan JKL2000's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hal... View Post
    Okay, so what where your answers?
    I explained that they weren't important, and not really any good. But that Sonny died in a sad skiing accident, and Cher is a gay icon who was rumored to have had some ribs removed to make her look thinner. And the song that Bill Murray hears on the radio every morning in Groundhog Day is their song "I've Got You Babe." That pretty much covers it, right?
    "Of course you are allowed to trumpet your profound ignorance by disagreeing with me." -- Facelift

  4. #1429
    If you get in a car, why do you get on a bus.
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  5. #1430
    Member since 7/13/2000 Hal...'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JKL2000 View Post
    I explained that they weren't important, and not really any good. But that Sonny died in a sad skiing accident, and Cher is a gay icon who was rumored to have had some ribs removed to make her look thinner. And the song that Bill Murray hears on the radio every morning in Groundhog Day is their song "I've Got You Babe." That pretty much covers it, right?
    I guess. I was just curious, that's all.

    But it does remind me of an old joke:

    Q: What do Al Gore and Sonny Bono have in common?
    A: They're both tree hugging stiffs.
    This conversation can serve no purpose anymore. Goodbye.

  6. #1431
    Quote Originally Posted by Hal... View Post
    I guess. I was just curious, that's all.

    But it does remind me of an old joke:

    Q: What do Al Gore and Sonny Bono have in common?
    A: They're both tree hugging stiffs.
    Well, if we're going to get political:

    A con man, a sex offender and mobster walk into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be, Mr. President?"
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  7. #1432
    Member Zeuhlmate's Avatar
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  8. #1433
    Member Vic2012's Avatar
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    Lol, burp

  9. #1434
    Howdy Dave (in MA)'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ronmac View Post
    A con man, a sex offender and mobster walk into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be, Mr. President?"
    "Ah, can y'all mix me a Razorback like the ones back in Little Rock? Put a little ice in it."

  10. #1435
    NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF STUPID PEOPLE IN LARGE GROUPS!

  11. #1436
    Member Zeuhlmate's Avatar
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  12. #1437
    The White Zone is for loading and unloading only. If you got to load or unload go to the White Zone.

  13. #1438
    The White Zone is for loading and unloading only. If you got to load or unload go to the White Zone.

  14. #1439
    Highly Evolved Orangutan JKL2000's Avatar
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    ^ This reminds me of the "Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers" comic in which Fat Freddy goes up to the pharmacy counter and says to the pharmacist "A large box of your cheapest condoms, my good man!"

    He then goes to pick up his date for the night. He rings the doorbell and the door is opened by the pharmacist.
    "Of course you are allowed to trumpet your profound ignorance by disagreeing with me." -- Facelift

  15. #1440
    Member Zeuhlmate's Avatar
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    Well, it ought to be a joke:


    You Can Get A Full-Course Christmas Dinner In One Can. The nine layers include turkey, potatoes, gravy, and Christmas pudding.


    https://www.delish.com/food-news/a25...nner-in-a-can/

  16. #1441
    Outraged bystander markwoll's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zeuhlmate View Post
    Well, it ought to be a joke:


    You Can Get A Full-Course Christmas Dinner In One Can. The nine layers include turkey, potatoes, gravy, and Christmas pudding.


    https://www.delish.com/food-news/a25...nner-in-a-can/
    This one from Trader Joe's is actually pretty good.
    turkey-stuffing-en-croute

    "It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it."
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  17. #1442
    Member Zeuhlmate's Avatar
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    And probably durable untill august 2041 too

  18. #1443
    I'm here for the moosic NogbadTheBad's Avatar
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    There will only be cockroaches left to eat it.
    Ian

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  19. #1444
    Quote Originally Posted by Zeuhlmate View Post
    And probably durable untill august 2041 too
    I picked up a can of freeze dried chicken at the Goodwill that's good until 2044.
    NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF STUPID PEOPLE IN LARGE GROUPS!

  20. #1445
    Highly Evolved Orangutan JKL2000's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zeuhlmate View Post
    Well, it ought to be a joke:


    You Can Get A Full-Course Christmas Dinner In One Can. The nine layers include turkey, potatoes, gravy, and Christmas pudding.


    https://www.delish.com/food-news/a25...nner-in-a-can/
    What the heck is "bread sauce?"
    "Of course you are allowed to trumpet your profound ignorance by disagreeing with me." -- Facelift

  21. #1446
    Quote Originally Posted by JKL2000 View Post
    What the heck is "bread sauce?"
    The goop that's left in the can after you let the rest slide out.
    The White Zone is for loading and unloading only. If you got to load or unload go to the White Zone.

  22. #1447
    Howdy Dave (in MA)'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zeuhlmate View Post
    Well, it ought to be a joke:


    You Can Get A Full-Course Christmas Dinner In One Can. The nine layers include turkey, potatoes, gravy, and Christmas pudding.


    https://www.delish.com/food-news/a25...nner-in-a-can/
    Maybe it is a joke? http://hoaxes.org/weblog/comments/christmas_tinner

  23. #1448
    Before I fix this can anyone out there tell me if they got the flavor right.

    NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF STUPID PEOPLE IN LARGE GROUPS!

  24. #1449
    What does one use for artificial cock flavor?

    It's a rhetorical question. I really don't want to know.
    The White Zone is for loading and unloading only. If you got to load or unload go to the White Zone.

  25. #1450
    I'm here for the moosic NogbadTheBad's Avatar
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    Authentic Jamaican Cock no less.
    Ian

    I blame Wynton, what was the question?
    There are only 10 types of people in the World, those who understand binary and those that don't.

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