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Thread: The Illness and Injury Thread

  1. #276
    Member Lou's Avatar
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    Very sorry for your loss Thomas. Like Vic, I fear that I will be experiencing this in the not too distant future.

  2. #277
    Member Jerjo's Avatar
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    Thomas, my deepest sympathies.
    I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down.'- Bob Newhart

  3. #278
    Highly Evolved Orangutan JKL2000's Avatar
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    My mother passed away this past Mother's Day, if you can believe that. It's very difficult, but Jerjo's right - you'll get through it. I was closer to my Dad, who died in 2007, and that was tough. But we get through it and have good memories.

  4. #279
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    Yanks,
    I'm very sorry to hear about your loss. I hope your own medical problems are improving.

    -Llanwydd

  5. #280
    Member Yanks2014's Avatar
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    Some news to give, and it's really bad. Not with my health, but with my family. 5 days after losing my father, it's tough even typing this, my oldest brother also passed away. His name is Rocco, and he lived in Utah. He took a fall at home, hit his head and never came to. We are not sure all the circumstances, as he had been ill, and had dizziness often. But he might have even taken his own life, we are not sure yet. I'm numb to this now, I don't think I've accepted that this even is real, I don't know how to feel.

    I wasn't close to Rocco, but did talk through emails all the time. Our family is very close knit, but for some reason Rocco was distant, and not just geographically. Growing up he was 8 years older, and we didn't have much in common. He moved out of state at 24 to Florida, and eventually several western states, and I only saw him every year or two. He did move back east in 02 (a 4 year stretch), and for a couple years my other brothers and me sort of reconnected with him. We found we all loved cigars and the outdoors, the same movies, and loved talking politics. But he lost his job, and abruptly moved to Montana in 06. He had a habit of losing contact with the whole family for long stretches, but then would call, and call often. Sadly he became estranged with his daughter from his first marriage, and we would here from him when he felt he could handle it. He knew my Dad was real sick, but maybe a week before my Dad died, he stopped calling. When my Dad died, he took it real bad, and couldn't even call my Mom. It was breaking my Mom's heart. My brothers reached out to him, but I guess he just couldn't handle things. If he did take his own life, it wont be a total shock as he tried to back in his late 20's. But I'd have trouble forgiving him, I admit, as it has devastated much of the family, especially my Mom. If it was an accident, well, that's also not easy to accept on the heels of my Dad. He was only 55, it's just so hard to comprehend.

    I've had enough of this crap. But we are a strong family, and we will lean on each other, our faith of course, and on our great friends, who have been amazing through all of this.

  6. #281
    Parrots Ripped My Flesh Dave (in MA)'s Avatar
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    Words fail. So sorry for your loss.

  7. #282
    Member Lou's Avatar
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    Praying that your family will get through this and see better times soon.

  8. #283
    Member Jerjo's Avatar
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    Thomas, I am stunned and saddened. Losing one family member is tough but back to back is cruel. Happening to my family in '98 and we were pretty well rocked. My deepest sympathies to you and hugs to your mother.
    I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down.'- Bob Newhart

  9. #284
    Highly Evolved Orangutan JKL2000's Avatar
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    Wow, I sure wasn't expecting to see something like this here. So sorry, Thomas. I'm glad your family is strong. How many other brothers do you have?

  10. #285
    Member Brian Griffin's Avatar
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    I'm at a loss as to what to say, all I can offer is my deepest sympathies

    So sorry for your loss but I love what you said about finding strength in your family

    Beautiful sentiment at a most difficult time

    BG
    "When Yes appeared on stage, it was like, the gods appearing from the heavens, deigning to play in front of the people."

  11. #286
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    Quote Originally Posted by JKL2000 View Post
    Wow, I sure wasn't expecting to see something like this here. So sorry, Thomas. I'm glad your family is strong. How many other brothers do you have?
    I have three. Two of them live here in NJ, and I see them all the time, we are very close. And thank goodness they have been over the house almost every day, along with their wives and children. We couldn't get through this without them. This is all so crazy. I was just starting to get beyond the shock of losing my Dad, I was handling it really well. I saw him grow weak and sick, I witnessed this first hand, every day, so it was very real. And I accepted that with his age and health issues that it was just a part of life. But my brother? It still doesn't feel real to me. I hadn't seen him in over three years, and while I knew he had issues, I didn't experience it first hand. And then the sudden loss, it's the ultimate punch in the gut. My brother was a complicated person, as was his relationship with the family. I would talk to him on the phone every now and then, but thanks to email, we talked all the time, usually about current events, crazy news stories, jokes etc. So he was far away, but it didn't always seem it. But I would give anything right now to be sitting outside smoking cigars with him, talking about what's wrong with the world and how we had all the answers.

  12. #287
    Member Yanks2014's Avatar
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    I thought I should tell you a bit about him, and what I loved and respected about him. Rocco was incredibly smart, and a frustrating know-it-all. Frustrating because often he was so right! Hell, pick a subject and he'd give you the entire history of it. Of course he also had to contradict you. The sky is blue, well he'd tell you it was black. And at the end of the conversation, he'd have you second guess what you thought you knew was true. He's one of those people who know how to fix everything. If there was a tool, he could tell you everything about how it worked. He was fascinated by everything, he had to know what made it tick. He loved the outdoors, camping, fishing, shooting, kayaking. Music? He's the one who introduced my to the Beatles, Pink Floyd and exposed me to classical music. And he had wide ranging tastes. I loved that he could see a classical concert one night, and the Grateful Dead the next. The Allman Brothers, they were probably his favorite. He wasn't really a prog fan, but he certainly appreciated well played music. He loved old movies, especially westerns. He was so happy when I told him recently my love of 1930's comedies, and right away mentioned one of my favorites, Bringing Up Baby. He also loved fantasy, especially Lord of the Rings. He was obsessed with the books in his college days. And he loved the movies. He was visiting in 2001 when the first movie came out, and it was a fun night seeing it with him. And of course he filled in all the details of what wasn't in the movie.

    My brother was one of the hardest workers ever, he totally had my father's work ethic and to the extreme. At one point he took a job at Lowe's in desperation, a simple sales clerk making peanuts. Within 7 years he was an operations manager, which meant he ran the entire store, had hundreds of people answering to him. Whatever job he took, you knew he'd do it well. He tried everything, from property manager to pest control to landscape artist. He did all these well, but would leave or wear out his welcome eventually. I think maybe he was just bored and was looking for the next challenge. He did start an eye wear business in Montana, but the timing was all wrong, just at the start of the terrible recession. I know he would have been a big success had the economy not tanked.

    I had mentioned he was estranged from his daughter. But she remained close with the rest of us, especially my Mom. One thing about her, she is so much like her father, it's scary, from her mannerisms, personality and of course being incredibly bright, so many things. We will see her next week, she coming up from DC. I will be seeing a part of my brother for sure, and he will live on through her.

  13. #288
    Highly Evolved Orangutan JKL2000's Avatar
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    It's cool that you still had a close relationship via email.

  14. #289
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    Quote Originally Posted by JKL2000 View Post
    It's cool that you still had a close relationship via email.

    Yeah, we always had that. Throughout the week there would be these group email conversations between myself, all three of my brothers and my best friend. My friend actually was very close with my brother in recent years, even visited him a couple times when my brother lived in Montana. Anyway, these emails were usually issue of the day stuff, or just something to goof on, and they would go back and forth all week, a lot of fun. We still do this now, but it looks strange just seeing 4 names on the email list. So every time I open my email account, I think of these discussions, it makes me sad each time.

    My brother Mike has made a nice slide show of photos for both my Dad and Rocco, and I've been tasked with coming up with music for each of these. It will be shown in a church and in front of family, so I want it to be appropriate. I did think of using a Alman Brothers song for my brother since they were one of his favorites. For my Dad, I'm stumped. Two days to figure this out.

    One of these days I'm going to post an obit of sorts for them as an RIP thread. Still can't do it, but I will.

  15. #290
    Member Camelogue's Avatar
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    My heart goes out to you Thomas.

    My almost 85 year old father, started insulin last week to go along with his 3 times per week dialysis. He has had 2 types of cancer, two heart attacks, open heart surgery, diabetic, and many other ailments, yet he just says "It's another blip."

  16. #291
    Member Yanks2014's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Camelogue View Post
    My heart goes out to you Thomas.

    My almost 85 year old father, started insulin last week to go along with his 3 times per week dialysis. He has had 2 types of cancer, two heart attacks, open heart surgery, diabetic, and many other ailments, yet he just says "It's another blip."
    Wow, thats a lot to deal with. Seems he has the right attitude. Hope I last into my 80's. But I try to savor the time now.

  17. #292
    Highly Evolved Orangutan JKL2000's Avatar
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    Wow, didn't realize Thomas was the last poster in this thread. We miss you, Yanks!

    Just heard about Harrison Ford's plane crash. Indy!! I hope he does ok.

  18. #293
    Parrots Ripped My Flesh Dave (in MA)'s Avatar
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    I heard that Ford was in critical condition and that he was in fair condition.

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