Knucklehead Challenge

[SteveSly]

^ Funny!

Once before going into a Tull show at Jones Beach my friend realized he'd locked his keys in his car. So I went in and he said he'd meet me after AAA or whoever unlocked his car. Once they unlocked it, he left his mobile phone on the hood of the car when he drove off.

Remarkably, no weed was involved!

The keys locked in the car thing reminds me of another story…….

My very first concert was The Doobie Brothers at Wings Stadium in Kalamazoo MI in 1978. I went with the same friend from the Journey story earlier in this thread. I was in high school and did not have a car so somehow I talked my dad into letting us take his car to the show. My dad was very strict when it came to drinking and driving and told me in no uncertain terms that I was not to have any alcohol anywhere near his car. So of course we got my friend’s older brother to buy us a 12 pack of beers and also had a bag of weed. Back then you used to be able to party in the parking lot before the show, so we hung out in the car throwing our empty beer cans in a bag in the back seat of the car to dispose of after the concert. So after the show was over we come out of the arena and it is pouring rain. Totally coming down in buckets. We run out to where the car is parked and to my horror I realized that before the concert I had left my keys in the ignition and they were now locked in the car. I start freaking out because of all the beer cans laying around in the car and the bag of weed in the glove compartment. If my dad has to come and open the car for us I will be in all kinds of trouble and probably never let me drive again. So we go back into the arena trying to find a coat hanger to jimmy the lock on the car. No luck. We go back outside and it is still raining buckets. There is a bowling alley a short walk away, so we go over there to try to find a coat hanger. Again no luck. I am really starting to freak out now thinking I am going to have to call my dad to unlock the car and I will be in big trouble. We walk back to the arena completely soaked to the bone and run into a security guy who had been out directing traffic. I ask him if he knows where I might find a coat hanger, and he says “I think I saw one on a fire hydrant over in the parking lot”. I am like, WTF did he just say…… a coat hanger on a fire hydrant? I thought I heard him wrong, so I asked him again and he pointed to this fire hydrant you could barely see way over on the other side of the parking lot. So we walk over there and sure enough there is a bent up coat hanger hanging on the top of this fire hydrant. Where it came from and who left it there, who the fu*k knows, but it was there. So we take it back to my car (it is still pouring rain and we are soaked) and after jimmying it for about 5 minutes I was able to unlock the car and all was saved. My buddy and I still talk about this one from time to time.

[markwoll]

A car story, of sorts.
I was going to see Fred Frith and Phil Minton at D.C. Space with a couple of friends, early '80's sometime.
One of the guys had a car and offered to drive.
He was an aficionado of old POS Mercury Capris.
So his car pulls up at my folks house and he jumps out and pops the hood and rummages around, sees me and asks "you drive a stick shift right?"
Yes. But he is driving....
It turns out that somehow the throttle cable snapped off somewhere near the gas pedal.
Instead of getting it fixed, or calling off the offer to drive, he pulled the throttle cable back through the firewall and up through the hood where he gripped the end with a pair of vicegrips and pulled to give it gas.
My job was to shift while he steered with one hand and jammed the vicegrips in the window and pulled with the other.
OK, lets go!
We picked up the other guy and made the 15 mile trip to DC.
Weird was the way back then. The show was great.
Then on the trip home at 1am, in the middle of the 14st bridge the wire in the throttle cable snapped. As we coasted to a stop he frantically unwound the cable to expose more wire to pull on.
After a short time we were underway again and made it home.
He got it fixed a couple of days later.
The things we will do ( in a somewhat misspent youth ) to get to a Fred Frith show.

[ThomasKDye]

Oh, here we go…

Got tickets for ABWH at Mountain View, California, in 1989. I was living in Las Vegas at the time. The idea was that me and my mother were going to move to the Bay Area before then, and both of us would see the show the following week. Well, unfortunately, that ended up being postponed because it turned out my job wasn't letting me go until two weeks AFTER the show. So I scrambled for a little time off. We then took a Greyhound bus to San Jose, then took a CAB to Mountain View and arrived halfway through "Birthright," meaning I'd missed all the introductory solo spots. When the show was over.. we stayed at a motel, then did the same routine in reverse. It cost me about ten times the ticket cost just to get to the show.

The final stinger? I'd asked my father to record the show on VHS, because this was the show that was broadcast on Pay-Per-View, and I ordered it specifically. Turns out he couldn't figure out the VCR and I got nothin'.

[JKL2000]

The keys locked in the car thing reminds me of another story…….

My very first concert was The Doobie Brothers at Wings Stadium in Kalamazoo MI in 1978. I went with the same friend from the Journey story earlier in this thread. I was in high school and did not have a car so somehow I talked my dad into letting us take his car to the show. My dad was very strict when it came to drinking and driving and told me in no uncertain terms that I was not to have any alcohol anywhere near his car. So of course we got my friend’s older brother to buy us a 12 pack of beers and also had a bag of weed. Back then you used to be able to party in the parking lot before the show, so we hung out in the car throwing our empty beer cans in a bag in the back seat of the car to dispose of after the concert. So after the show was over we come out of the arena and it is pouring rain. Totally coming down in buckets. We run out to where the car is parked and to my horror I realized that before the concert I had left my keys in the ignition and they were now locked in the car. I start freaking out because of all the beer cans laying around in the car and the bag of weed in the glove compartment. If my dad has to come and open the car for us I will be in all kinds of trouble and probably never let me drive again. So we go back into the arena trying to find a coat hanger to jimmy the lock on the car. No luck. We go back outside and it is still raining buckets. There is a bowling alley a short walk away, so we go over there to try to find a coat hanger. Again no luck. I am really starting to freak out now thinking I am going to have to call my dad to unlock the car and I will be in big trouble. We walk back to the arena completely soaked to the bone and run into a security guy who had been out directing traffic. I ask him if he knows where I might find a coat hanger, and he says “I think I saw one on a fire hydrant over in the parking lot”. I am like, WTF did he just say…… a coat hanger on a fire hydrant? I thought I heard him wrong, so I asked him again and he pointed to this fire hydrant you could barely see way over on the other side of the parking lot. So we walk over there and sure enough there is a bent up coat hanger hanging on the top of this fire hydrant. Where it came from and who left it there, who the fu*k knows, but it was there. So we take it back to my car (it is still pouring rain and we are soaked) and after jimmying it for about 5 minutes I was able to unlock the car and all was saved. My buddy and I still talk about this one from time to time.

Holy crap you were lucky!

[JKL2000]

> I'd missed all the introductory solo spots.

Holy crap you were lucky!

[SteveSly]

The mention of a Dio concert on another thread brought another knucklehead concert moment to mind…..

It was in the early to mid-80’s (I don’t remember exactly what year). Me and 3 other people decided we were going to go see Ronnie James Dio and Twisted Sister at Pine Knob over north of Detroit. Pine Knob is an outdoor ampatheater located at the base of a ski resort and about a 2.5 hour drive from where I live. So……on the day of the show we score some acid. We plan it all out. We will take the acid when we get about an hour away from the concert venue. That way when we get there it will start kicking in and then we can tailgate with some beers in the parking lot for a few hours before the actual show. Great plan right? Wrong…….we get to about Jackson MI and drop the acid (I was driving) thinking this will be perfect timing. But…..somewhere along the way I took a wrong turn and we get lost. This is long before GPS’s in cars. An hour goes by and the acid starts really kicking in and I am completely lost. We keep driving through these little towns and I am totally freaking out as I have no idea where I am. Finally we are driving through this burg and we see a girl standing on the side of the road in a cheerleader outfit. We pull over and ask her if she knows where Pine Knob is. This poor girl has this look of pure fear on her face talking to a car of freaked out strangers but she was pretty cool and gave us directions, even though we were still quite a ways away from the venue. So we start down the road again and in my altered state within about 5 minutes I am completely lost again. We drive and drive and finally my buddy in the back seat shouts out “look over there; it’s a ski resort, the only one for miles”. Sure enough we can see a ski hill and think holy shit, we finally found it. So we start heading towards the ski hill. By this time it is about 2 hours since we took the acid and it is really really kicking in to the point where I really should have pulled over and parked the car. But, being young and stupid we start heading towards this ski hill. As we get closer we notice that there does not seem to be much traffic. We finally get to the entrance and find that it is Mount Holley, not Pine Knob. Mount Holley is another ski resort which is about a half hour from Pine Knob. So we were still nowhere close to the concert venue. To make a long story short we finally made it from there to Pine Knob. When we got there Twisted Sister’s set was already over and Dio had just come on stage. We ended up seeing most of Dio’s set, but it is a miracle we got there at all. Oh the stupid things you do when you are young……..

[Vic2012]

Well, you were spared having to see the twisted ones. Horrible band. Just awful. I'd rather listen to Kiss than TS and I don't even like Kiss.

[Vic2012]

NP: "Wild Side" - Mötley Crüe.

[SteveSly]

Well, you were spared having to see the twisted ones. Horrible band. Just awful. I'd rather listen to Kiss than TS and I don't even like Kiss.

I owned the album with "We're Not Gonna Take It" on it, and thought it was pretty decent at the time.

[JKL2000]

Scary to think people were driving around on acid.

[Vic2012]

I played bongos on acid. Never tried driving on acid. I went bowling on mushrooms once. Hilarious.

[SteveSly]

Scary to think people were driving around on acid.

Not something that I am necessarily proud of today, but as mentioned I was young and stupid at the time.

[JKL2000]

I think Steve wins this thread - not just because of driving on acid, just a load of funny concert experiences.

Great thread. I'll bet I can think of a few more if I try.

[Supersonic Scientist]

Not my "personal" knucklehead story but I was a part of the "event".

198X, going to see Pink Floyd at Giants Stadium with my co-worker Mike. We get there WAY early to tailgate/Party, etc. Parked next to us is a group of 4 very pretty checks. We start chatting them up and lo-and-behold, their seats (ground level) are right in front of ours!!! (what are the frilling chances of that?!!!)...now please remember that this was a time when those stupid Bartle & James wine coolers were very popular. I think we had a case of them & a case of some actual beer too. Mike was downing thse B&J things like water. It was a fairly warm day and he was getting wasted. We finally get inside. As soon as he sits down, he massively throws-up on the ground in front of himself. The girls were disgusted and didn't talk to me the rest of the night. Before the show even starts, Mike falls asleep in his chair and I had to FINALLY wake him up at the end of the show because I needed to get his car keys from him because he was certainly NOT going to be driving me home. He missed the entire show!!!

[SteveSly]

Not my "personal" knucklehead story but I was a part of the "event".

198X, going to see Pink Floyd at Giants Stadium with my co-worker Mike. We get there WAY early to tailgate/Party, etc. Parked next to us is a group of 4 very pretty checks. We start chatting them up and lo-and-behold, their seats (ground level) are right in front of ours!!! (what are the frilling chances of that?!!!)...now please remember that this was a time when those stupid Bartle & James wine coolers were very popular. I think we had a case of them & a case of some actual beer too. Mike was downing thse B&J things like water. It was a fairly warm day and he was getting wasted. We finally get inside. As soon as he sits down, he massively throws-up on the ground in front of himself. The girls were disgusted and didn't talk to me the rest of the night. Before the show even starts, Mike falls asleep in his chair and I had to FINALLY wake him up at the end of the show because I needed to get his car keys from him because he was certainly NOT going to be driving me home. He missed the entire show!!!

Went to a college bowl game in Detroit back in the early 80’s (I think it was the called The Cherry Bowl back then). One of the guys I went with got so drunk before the game that we had to take him to the first aid station in the Silverdome and he ended up sleeping through the whole game. He didn’t see a single down.

Also was at a Jimmy Buffett concert a few years ago when young girl 2 seats down from me puked about half way through the show. It was pretty gross.

[JKL2000]

He missed the entire show!!!

Yet to this day he talks of how awesome it was.

I worked with a girl who went to a Broadway show with another girl we worked with ( Sondheim's "Passion"). They went for margaritas before, and when they were in their seats before the show, girl 1 hurled right there in her seat. At a Broadway show! Girl 2 bailed because she was so embarrassed by the first girl hurling. Girl 1 stayed.

I'll never forget watching the debut of Star Trek: TNG because I was at a party where this chick massively power puked while sitting in a recliner. That's entertainment!

[JKL2000]

Went to a college bowl game in Detroit back in the early 80’s (I think it was the called The Cherry Bowl back then). One of the guys I went with got so drunk before the game that we had to take him to the first aid station in the Silverdome and he ended up sleeping through the whole game. He didn’t see a single down.

Also was at a Jimmy Buffett concert a few years ago when young girl 2 seats down from me puked about half way through the show. It was pretty gross.

It's always gross, yet often entertaining. The Technicolor Yawn.

[Dave the Brave]

Once whole driving under the influence of acid my car ran out of gas right in the middle of a very busy intersection.

Fun times.

Concert horror:

Audience
Cactus
Rod Stewart
Dec 9 1971 Toronto Maple Leaf Gardens.

I actually went strictly to see Cactus.

Rod Had recently released Every Picture Tells a Story.

My buddy who I went with said "I'll meet you at the venue and pick up some booze on the way"

Well I figured he would grab a bottle and we would pop it back before the show. Fucker picks up 2 40oz bottles of rum which we manage to sneak in to the show.

In those days I couldn't hold my liquor so good and after half finishing my bottle I passed out half way through the opening act, Audience.

Finally came to as Rod the mod is doing his second encore and proceeded to toss my cookies all over the guy in front of me who was totally oblivious to just what happened, luckily for me.

DtB

[Sturgeon's Lawyer]

Not exactly knuckleheaded, but ...

In June of 1980, my wife graduated from Cal Berkeley. The same day, Gentle Giant was playing in San Francisco, so I left immediately from the graduation ceremony, skipping the celebratory dinner with her family, for the show.

While watching the opening act - a magician - I got a migraine. I gave up and left.

This was the only chance I ever had to see Gentle Giant. If I'd have known that, I would have suffered through it.

[WHORG]

Zep's "The Song Remains the Same" concert at MSG - night #2.

We totally forgot what parking garage, not to mention which floor & location our vehicle was located. We were blasted . . .

It took us about 3 hours to finally get on the road - but totally worth it: classic show.

[SteveSly]

Zep's "The Song Remains the Same" concert at MSG - night #2.

We totally forgot what parking garage, not to mention which floor & location our vehicle was located. We were blasted . . .

It took us about 3 hours to finally get on the road - but totally worth it: classic show.

Wow losing the car, reminds me of another one………

This one actually involves no drugs, alcohol or puke. It was either Dec 1979 or Jan 1980. I was living in a dorm at Albion College in Albion Michigan about a little over an hour from Detroit. I am in the shower in the afternoon and this buddy of mine says, “Hey do you want to go see The Who tonight”? I say, “Do you have tickets?” And he says no, we’ll just buy some at the door. I should have known better, but said “sure, let’s do it”. So we climb in his car and head to the Pontiac Silverdome which is an 80,000 seat monster of a football stadium, where the Detroit Lions played at the time. We get in a massive traffic jam once close to the stadium so it takes a long time to get to the parking lot. By the time we get there it is almost ShowTime. We get parked, trek to the box office, and find that the show is completely sold out. We are both young and poor so scalper prices are a bit above our price range, but we are kind of stuck so we try to find a scalper. There are a few around selling tickets, but we don’t have the money they are asking (Regular price for the concert was only $11.00). Start time for the show comes and goes (I believe The Clash were opening if I remember correctly), and we are still stuck. Finally it is well after start time and we find a guy with two tickets. He wants more than we have, but finally he says “how much have you got?”, and sells us ticket for $25 each (an enormous price at the time). It literally emptied both of our wallets, but we had tickets! So we finally get in the building just as the lights go down for The Who. The show is all general admission and we can’t find a seat anywhere, plus it is dark so we are stumbling over people. Finally we end up sitting on the stairs in the isle at the very top of the end zone as far away from the stage as you could possibly be. The band literally looked like ants down on the stage. They did have a “jumbo” screen, but it was pretty primitive compared today's, and not all that big. Although The Who were really good, it was not all that enjoyable being so far away and having to sit on stairs. We kind of sat there through the whole thing thinking it had been a dumb idea. After the concert is over we get out to the parking lot and cannot find the car (we are both stone cold sober). We look and look, walk and walk no fucking car. This goes on for about an hour. It is the middle of winter we are freezing our asses off. Finally we become convinced that the car has been stolen. We find a cop and tell him our dilemma, he kind of rolls his eyes and asks us are we sure we know where we parked blah blah blah……well, to make a long story short we finally figure out that somehow we ended up on the complete opposite side of the stadium from where we had gone in and our car was parked on the other side. In our defense this parking around this facility is massive and it was dark out, but in the end it was a good two hours after the show when we finally found the car. We felt like total idiots………are you seeing a pattern here……